The Babysitters
by Funny Unicorn Called Koko
Summary: Alfred Jones finds himself taking care of a baby handed to him at a McDonald's and not having any idea what to do, he calls upon the only people who can help him-really, the only people available-the Bad Friends Trio.


**The Babysitters**

**An Axis Powers Hetalia Fanfic**

** Characters: America, France, Spain, Prussia, Gilbert, mentions of England and Scotland (Human AU)**

** Pairing: Minor France/Scotland**

** Notes: I started this up in the middle of the night and only just finished it now so it's not exactly my best work but I'm posting it up anyway! Hope you enjoy! Also, Hetalia does not belong to me!**

** Warnings: boy*boy relationships**

**Present Time**

"Hello?"

"Hey Artie! I need your help!" Alfred F. Jones chirped into the phone.

"This is not 'Artie'," a delicate French accented voice replied. "This is Francis."

"What? Did I call the wrong number?" Alfred looked down at his mobile phone quizzically, seeing that he had indeed dialed his English friend Arthur Kirkland.

"Non. I am at Arthur's house, visiting his lovely brother Scott," Francis answered calmly. "Arthur is not in at the moment but I can take a message for you."

"Ah man," Alfred groaned. "I really needed his help! Maybe you can help me?"

"Help?" Francis asked, sounding very interested. "With what?"

"Weeeell it's kind of a long story-" Alfred looked at the baby laying on the couch and sighed.

**2 Hours Earlier**

"Order 49!" called out the nasally voice of the grumpy teen working behind the counter at the local McDonald's. Alfred looked down at his receipt and saw that his number was up next. He was sitting down at one of the tables near the register, playing on his iPhone as he waited. The restaurant was nearly empty-only a couple of the tables being filled out by a woman with her baby, two teens on what looked to be a date, an old homeless man who had got some money for food somehow, and a depressed looking middle aged man in a business suit. The only one who actually looked happy to be there was Alfred himself. He smiled as he beat his high score on Robot Unicorn Attack.

"Order 50!" the grumpy employee shouted and Alfred nearly dropped his phone on the ground as he hurried to get his meal. He smiled and thanked the employee who just rolled his eyes and then he walked back to his table, when the woman with the baby suddenly came up to him. She looked, Alfred noted, like shit. There were dark bags under her brown eyes, her black hair was tangled and undone, and her clothes were horribly mismatched. She wasn't even wearing the same kind of shoes. The baby in her arms, about 8 months old by the looks of it, was wailing and flailing his little chubby arms.

"Hold my kid for a sec," she thrust the baby into Alfred's hands, causing him to drop his tray full of burgers.

"…Uh…" he stared down at the crying child, confused. "What?" He looked back up and saw the woman rushing in the direction of the bathrooms. Shrugging, he shushed the baby-the baby kept up its wailing- picked up his tray and sat down, munching on his burgers as he waited for the woman to come back for the next hour and a half until he finally decided it would be best to just leave, baby in tow.

**Present Time:**

"YOU TOOK HER BABY?" Francis said shrilly as the blond finished up his tale.

"Ouch dude. Not so loud!" he hissed, holding the phone away from his ear. "And I didn't take the little guy. She gave him to me!"

"Mon Dieu Alfred!" Francis slapped his forehead. "That woman abandoned her child and you didn't think to call the police?"

"Of course I did!" Alfred rolled his eyes though Francis could not see this. "But I'm not gonna call…yet. I mean. She did say, for a sec! I'm assuming she's coming back. I told the employees to tell her where I live if she returns there. And if she doesn't contact me within the next twelve hours I'll just take the kid to the police station!"

"That has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say," Francis's sigh sounded staticky through the line. "But suit yourself mon ami."

Alfred sat down and looked down at the sleeping baby. "Anyway. I need help taking care of this kid. I've never dealt with small children before you know?"

"And you thought Arthur would be able to help you?" the Frenchman snorted. "I'll help you Alfred, but I still need to spend some 'quality' time with Scott so you will have to wait for about two hours-"

"I'M WEARING THE KILT!" a loud, male's voice interrupted.

"-Make that three hours and then I shall head to your house, oui?" said Francis. As if sensing that Alfred was about to complain, Francis quickly added. "Until then, I know someone who would be absolutely perfect to help you. Write down the number so you can call my good friend up."

Alfred nodded and jotted down the number Francis gave him, thanking the Frenchman fervently before he hung up on him to enjoy his quality time with the Scot. He dialed up the number, waiting impatiently for the ringing to stop.

"Hola!" a cheerful, accented voice came out from the other line.

"…Antonio?" Alfred said blankly.

"Si. Who is this?" Antonio Carriedo, a Spaniard who Alfred knew to be very good friends with Francis, asked. Alfred held his hand over the mouthpiece and groaned. How did Francis expect the Spaniard to be able to help him?

"It's Alfred Jones," the American replied sullenly then realized his hand was still over the mouthpiece and repeated his name.

"Oh si! I know you! You're Francis and Arthur's buddy right? What's up?" Antonio spoke very quickly.

Alfred sighed and decided to trust the Frenchman's judgment. "Uh…how good are you with kids?"

If the Spaniard was surprised by the seemingly random question, he didn't show it. "I'm very good! I baby-sit my neighbor's cute little Italian twins all the time!"

Alfred perked up slightly. "Really? Then you wouldn't mind helping me 'baby-sit' a little baby, about 7 or 8 months old I think? Francis suggested that you'd be able to help me."

"It's no problem at all amigo! I can help you," Antonio answered in a chipper tone. "I'll head to your house in a bit! Bye!" He hung up and Alfred smiled, glad he was finally getting some help. Then, he narrowed his blue eyes and dialed the Spaniard up again.

"Hey Antonio, it's Al again," Alfred said when the other picked up. "I was wondering, do you know where I live?"

There was a pause at the end of the other line. "…No I don't," Antonio said sheepishly.

Alfred gave the address to him and was about to hang up when Antonio called out quickly.

"You don't mind if Gil tags along do you?" he asked, referring to his German friend Gilbert Beilschmidt. "He says he's really good with kids too."

"Bring him along," Alfred answered. "The more the merrier!"

"Vale!" Antonio said before hanging up. "See you soon!"

Alfred hung up and stuffed his phone into his jeans pocket. The baby was starting to stir and quietly fawning over his adorableness, Alfred picked him up gently, not wanting to jostle him too much and risk waking him.

Fifteen minutes later, there was a loud knock on the door and the baby woke up with a start, looking up at Alfred before bursting into tears.

"Gah! Dammit!" Alfred cursed, walking over to the door, bouncing the baby in his arms, trying to calm him.

"Hallo!"

"Hola!" two voices greeted simultaneously. Alfred glared at the two visitors, a toned dark-skinned man with messy brown hair and bright green eyes and a tall, pale-albino, actually- man with red eyes and white hair.

"You made the baby cry," he said irritably, stepping aside to let them in.

"Hand me the baby," the green-eyed man, Antonio said seriously, holding out his arms. Alfred complied and handed the crying baby to the Spaniard who instantly started cooing at him in Spanish. The American led the way to the living room where they all sat down.

"So Alfred. How did you end up with a baby?" Gilbert asked, sitting on a beanbag chair near the fireplace. "Have too much of a good time in college?" Antonio listened in interest as he worked to shush the child.

"Shut up," Alfred said, rolling his eyes. "The baby's not mine."

"Not yours? Then why do you have him with you?" Gilbert frowned. "Good job on not knocking anyone up at school then by the way. You're way too young."

"I'm not that young," Alfred said. "Anyway about the baby…" He spent the next few minutes telling the story he'd told Francis and by the end of it, both the Spaniard and the German were gaping at him.

"Hey! You got the baby to stop crying!" Alfred beamed, not really noticing the odd stares the other two were giving him.

"Hm? Ah, yes I did," Antonio nodded, smiling down at the baby who was currently sucking on his own chubby little fingers. "You don't know his name do you?"

"Nope," he replied. "I just keep calling him little baby."

"Why don't we name him after his vati?" Gilbert grinned, then frowned at Alfred and Antonio's blank expressions. "I mean his papa you dummkopfs." They continued to look at him blankly. "I'm talking about Al!"

"Al? Me? I told you, I'm not the kid's dad!" Alfred retorted.

"Doesn't matter! I hereby christen this child Alfred Jr. or Freddie for short!" Gilbert declared before laughing obnoxiously.

Alfred sighed in defeat as Antonio joined in the laughing. But, he looked over at the little baby gurgling happily in the Spaniard's arms, it really wasn't too bad, having a kid named after him.

**30 minutes later**

The three young men were still sitting in the living room, just talking when the little baby Freddie, let out a loud wail.

"What's wrong?" Alfred asked quickly. "Why's the little baby crying?"

"No se!" Antonio replied, patting Freddie's back gently in an attempt to soothe him. He wrinkled his nose. "Oh no. I think I know why he's crying after all. Do you have diapers?"

"Diapers? No I don't," Alfred said, frowning. "Ohh…we should go buy some?"

"You think?" Gilbert stood up. "Gimme some money and I'll go buy a pack."

"I'm going with you dude," Alfred said, standing up as well.

"I wanna go too!" said Antonio. The other two looked at him, still holding Freddie whose wails were getting louder.

"But the baby is crying!" Alfred sighed. "Someone needs to take care of him."

"We can take him with us!" Antonio replied. "Hush hush little one!"

"Schieße," Gilbert groaned, covering his ears. "Whatever. Let's all go!" He strode out of the house, leaving the American and the Spaniard to follow after him.

"We're taking my car!" Alfred called out, running to the driver's side and sliding in.

"I call shotgun!" Antonio called out after him.

"Uh…how are we going to buckle the kid in Al? You don't have a seat for him," Gilbert pointed out.

"Hm…just buckle him up like a regular person?" Alfred suggested. "I'll drive really carefully!" Gilbert frowned, about to suggest that someone just hold the kid but ultimately he chose not to. The Spaniard handed Freddie to Gilbert before climbing into the passenger's side, obviously relieved at not having to hold the weeping child anymore. Gilbert sat in the backseat and strapped Freddie in, frowning and cursing quietly as the baby flailed his arms, crying even louder.

"Shut up little baby," Alfred said, feeling on the verge of tears-of frustration- himself. He was so not liking this whole having to take care of a baby thing at the moment.

Alfred all but ran out of the car once they'd arrived, wanting to get away from the crying if only for a few minutes. Antonio and Gilbert seemed to have the same idea as they sprinted into the store after him.

"Hmm so we should buy diapers and some formula yeah? 'Cause the baby might get hungry," Alfred said, smiling at the peacefulness he felt at no longer hearing the sobbing.

"Ja, that's a good idea," Gilbert nodded, stretching out his arms. "Oh do you guys hear that?"

"Hear what?" Antonio asked.

"Exactly," Gilbert grinned. "We got little Freddie to shut up….where is the little tyke?" He had looked at the other two, and saw their empty hands.

"Shit!"

"Mierda!"

"Schieße!" Other customers stared as the three men raced out of the store and to Alfred's car where they could still hear Freddie's sobs. Alfred reached the car first, hurriedly taking Freddie out, shushing him hysterically.

"Holy crap I am so sorry little dude!" Alfred was saying, wrinkling his nose in disgust at the smell emanating from the child. Freddie of course, did not answer, though his cries did get even louder.

"Freddie's got quite the set of lungs on him huh?" Antonio noted, no longer panicking once he'd seen the baby was relatively okay.

Gilbert nodded and led the way back to the store, paler than usual at the scare. "Let's just get the stuff and go."

Alfred walked to the diaper aisle and looked through the different brands while trying to calm Freddie whose sobs were attracting the attention of other customers. A woman walking by with her own baby glared at the American, as if blaming him for Freddie's tears.

"Someone shut that kid up," an angry, heavy-set and obviously drunk man snapped as he walked over to the aisle where Alfred and the others were standing.

"I'm sorry," Alfred said sheepishly, bouncing Freddie up and down. His cries increased and Alfred held back a groan.

"I said shut the kid up!" the man said angrily, pushing Alfred roughly. Alfred stumbled back, narrowing his eyes. Antonio and Gilbert glared at the guy, stepping in front of Alfred and Freddie.

"He's holding a kid! Don't push him like that!" Gilbert snapped.

"Hehe, little sissy boy needs his friends to defend him," the man laughed over Freddie's cries. "Shut him up!" He tried pushing past the Spaniard and the German, trying to get to the American and the baby but the other two reacted quickly and punched him in the gut and face. Freddie giggled and his tears subsided.

"Little dude likes violence," Alfred said, looking from Freddie to the man now laying on the floor unconscious.

"I guess he does," Antonio chuckled. "Let's hurry to get the diapers before this guy wakes up yes?"

"Or before we're kicked out of the store," Gilbert added, grabbing the most expensive pack of diapers he could find.

"We still gotta get the formula…and maybe some toys to keep Freddie entertained!" Alfred said, going to get said things and once they were done they headed back to Alfred's house.

"I'm not changing the kid's diapers!" was the first thing Gilbert said once they were back in the living room.

"I'm not either!" Alfred exclaimed, walking in behind him, holding Freddie.

"I'll do it!" Antonio chirped. "Give Freddie to me!" Alfred handed the baby to him.

"He's so cute but he's really stinky," Alfred said, smiling at the baby.

"Yeah. He's been wearing that soiled diaper for a while. I think we should give him a bath," Antonio said, holding the baby at a distance. "Lead me to your bathroom!"

"I'll wait out here!" Gilbert called out to them as they walked to the bathroom.

Alfred turned on the tap in the bathtub, making sure the water was warm enough and then filled it up 1/3 of the way.

"I'll hold him and you scrub him," Antonio said and Alfred nodded. The Spaniard set the baby down on the tub after he'd removed his clothes and dirty diaper, and grabbed onto him before he could slip. Freddie shuddered and looked at the water, before slapping his hands down on it, splashing him and laughing.

"Que lindo!" Antonio squealed. Alfred laughed and handed Freddie a yellow rubber ducky. "Oh you bought him that too?"

"Huh? No…that's mine," Alfred replied, chuckling slightly as he pulled out body wash meant for kids-also his but he wasn't going to admit that. He scrubbed Freddie's little body and then his dark black hair, making sure to not get any shampoo in the child's eyes. Freddie was surprisingly complacent the whole time, seeming to enjoy his bath time. He almost cried when Antonio pulled him out of the tub to dry him off but Alfred, seeing this coming slapped himself across the face, making the baby giggle again. They dressed the baby back up and then headed back to the living room where Gilbert and Francis were talking.

"When did you get here?" Alfred asked the Frenchman.

"A few minutes ago. My date was cut short unfortunately," Francis sighed, perking up at the sight of the baby. "Oh he's precious!" He stood up and took Freddie from the Spaniard's arms. Freddie tugged on Francis's long, blond locks. "Ow!"

Alfred and the others laughed at the baby's gleeful expression. "I think he likes you Franny," Gilbert snickered.

"Bad baby!" Francis scolded, only to have his hair pulled again. Still laughing, Alfred took the baby back, his laughter only stopping when Freddie pulled on his cowlick. "Dang it, ow!" He was about to say more when they heard loud yelling coming from outside. The four males stared at each other then ran outside to find Matthew, Alfred's brother, being accosted by an angry woman.

"I GAVE YOU MY KID! WHERE IS HE?" she was saying, and Alfred instantly recognized her as the woman from McDonald's.

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT LADY! YOU'RE INSANE!" Matthew retorted, surprisingly loud for once.

"I HAVE YOUR KID RIGHT HERE!" Alfred said just as loudly. The woman turned to look at him.

"Oh thank god. I thought I lost my poor little Jason!" she cried hysterically, reaching out for the baby.

"Jason?" Antonio said, confused. "Oh you mean Freddie."

"His name is JASON." The woman snapped. "Give him to me!"

"Non! Not until you give us a legitimate excuse as to why you left your child with a stranger and then just left!" said Francis angrily. The woman paused and looked at all of them, tears welling up.

"I was just so tired," she sniffled. "I needed someone to hold him while I went to the bathroom. I fell asleep in one of the stalls and only woke up a while ago."

"That's not true!" Alfred spoke up, still holding on to Freddie. "An employee went in to look for you but didn't see anyone!"

"That is because I accidentally entered the men's restroom…it's where I fell asleep," she explained shakily. "When I came out, one of the employees recognized me and told me to come here, saying the boy I'd given my baby to care for had given them this address." Matthew looked from his brother to the woman in shock at hearing the story.

"What do I do you guys?" Alfred looked at everyone else. "Should I give the baby back? Or call child services?" At the mention of child services, the woman let out a sob.

"I think it was an honest mistake," Antonio was the first to speak up.

"You really shouldn't have left your child with a stranger," Francis said sternly. "It was very fortunate that it was Alfred you gave your baby to and not some crazy person."

"I knew I could trust the kid," she mumbled. "I see him at McDonald's all the time and he seemed like a good guy."

"Give Freddie back," Gilbert sighed. "I don't like seeing women cry." Alfred frowned and looked down at Freddie who was still yanking on his cowlick, though he hadn't noticed. The baby looked up at him and giggled before finally taking notice of his mother and reaching out for her.

He sighed and handed him to her. "You should take better care of your kid," he said.

"Thank you!" the woman took Freddie and hugged him tightly. "I swear I will never do something so stupid again! Thank you so much!" She kissed Alfred on the cheek, smiling through her tears. "Thank you so much for taking care of my little Jason! I really am so sorry to have troubled you all." She cooed at the baby, kissing his little face multiple times as she walked away, and the baby stared back at the 5 males, waving a chubby little arm at them. The five young men stared back and waved, all holding back little squeals.

"I'm gonna miss little Freddie," Alfred admitted once the woman and baby were no longer in view.

"I am too," Antonio nodded. "I had fun…kind of."

Gilbert came up between the two and slung an arm around their shoulders. "So, Francis and I were talkin' about this whole baby business earlier and we were thinkin', we should start a babysitting service!" Matthew rolled his eyes and Francis grinned.

_A babysitting service? _Alfred thought to himself. _That could be very interesting._

**To be continued maybe**


End file.
